long.

haven't written in a while..i will soon, not right now, for 3 reasons...

1. I am tired.
2. my nails are drying and the smell is giving me a headache..
3. ..not helped by the teatowel i tied around my head for the Hells Kitchen final...

ciaoo x

jaded.

I don't know what to do, or say. I don't know what I can.
But slowly going insane. I don't know how much longer I can let you put it off.

shower.

Inconsistency is my middle name.
Like Oliver Cromwell, I am consistent in nothing. Which will help in revising for my unit 6 exam, but not in much else.

ain't it funny.

So I haven't posted in a while, so its probably about time.
There's been a few moments of hilarity, none of which I can remember (or would seem so funny out of context and so on). These holidays have been good so far, haven't really done much though, and have done even less work.
Teds isn't talking to me, and i'm not sure why. I was supposed to meet up with him on wednesday but then I couldn't because I forgot I was supposed to be visiting the Regal in Oxford with my sister and helping with her website, whilst that was also my only free day to do homework. So I sent him a text tuesday afternoon and have had no reply. So really, if he's going to be like that then fuck it.
Also, Bike is being a bit of an idiot about this whole thing and whilst he is texting me back now, still not really talking and he seems very reluctant.
But one advantage has come out of this, which is that i'm beginning to work out exactly how I operate in terms of people. Which isn't necessarily a good thing because i'm mainly finding faults. At least, I think I am.
I think I might have been a bit hasty, however on reflection this is ok because of my horoscope (which why explain why i'm feeling as i am at the moment). So it feels as it does when a close friend or something goes away, or you break up with someone and you know it's wrong.
But then i'm thinking this is just because I like to want what I can't have and when I can have it, I don't want it anymore. A bit like that guy in that film with Jennifer Aniston where he's sleeping with her but isn't interested when he finds out she's dumped her "boyfriend" for him.
So yeah.
But I might actually be missing him. I know I am as a friend, because he's the only one I could really talk to but I just don't know.

If anyone's reading this, some advice would be nice.

just dance.

So its 3 minutes to midnight (almost got Iron Maiden in there) and it is FREEZING in my room. I've started getting cold hand syndrome again which means i'm on the computer too much (resting arm on desk cuts off circulation = coldness) but this doesn't explain why my feet are always so cold.

I was just thinking about music. I used to always be sifting through Purevolume and Myspace Music and so on, trying to find something new, but now I don't. I was thinking about songs by Less Than Jake and singing them in my head, loving the words and the rythmn and just everything. But whenever I have those songs on my itunes/ipod, I skip past them. I'm skipping My Chemical Romance and Good Charlotte (can't believe i've still got them on there) and I don't know why. They used to set me on fire but now? Not so sure.

Either way, I am looking forward to McFly in a few weeks time, they never fail to make me fall in love with their music everytime, like my heart is going to burst out of my chest. Love it. Love the rush.

I still have no idea what i'm going to do for my birthday. Do I want a party? Do I want a present? Do I want money? I DONT KNOW. I suppose this is because I am female. We never really know what we want. Or that's just me, but that's how it is, either way.

Ho hum. I am hungry but cannot eat because I have recently brushed my teeth and still have that minty taste that makes everything taste revolting.

Yay for health.

Or not.