the line begins to blur.

I was just thinking about relationships and emotions, and I had a realisation.

Everyone tells you that when you fall in love, it's different every time, I think I mentioned that in a blog before. But what they also tell you is that usually, when you look back on previous relationships when you're in another or at least getting feelings for someone else, you realise how not in love you were.

But it's different for me. Now I'm thinking back to everything that happened and I realised that I really did love him. More than I had realised at the time, I think, and if I could do it again I would do it differently - but that's not saying I want to do it again.

I also realise now, thinking about this, how thin the line is between Love and Hate. When we said those vicious things to each other, at least on my part, I said them because I hated him for what he was doing to me, because I loved him. Heartbreak is such a physical as well as emotional feeling. It was as though my heart was literally torn in half inside my chest. The beats got dull and slow, and the ache was incredible. Such a change from how I felt in love but strangely similar. There was still that intense passion and emotion. It takes a lot to get you over that line between Love and Hate but once you're there it seems like the quickest transition in the world.

I fear if I write anymore this will turn into a jumbled rambling (if it hasn't already), and so I will stop here...