weakness.

Alright. So i'm just going to type for a while hopefully, and see what becomes of this.

I'm currently sat in the dark with just the light of my laptop screen slowly burning my tired eyes. I always wonder, when I do this, why am I still sat here? My eyes are tired, my head starts to hurt and I can't really think or concentrate. And then I think, and I realise. That actually, when I have my depressed days (or weeks, as it goes), I wonder what I have to wake up to. The answer is usually nothing. So I know that while i'm wasting time here, trying to convince myself i'm doing something productive, i'm really just putting off sleeping so I don't wake up so soon.
I've suddenly found myself with about 28 days left of life as I know it, and it's slipping away so swiftly, like sand through my fingers. I can't hold on.

So that's why I'm still here. I have just under 2 weeks until a 2 week break, and it can start as many days away as it likes. I wonder if everyone goes through this when they have to leave somewhere they've been happy and comfortable for 7 years? Although I'm not sure why - I didn't feel like this when I left junior school, or perhaps I didn't know it. And i'm definitely not happy or comfortable there anymore.

I always want things until I can get them, too. Mr R decides that he likes me now, and I don't want anything to do with him. Mainly for reasons outlined in a previous post. It's just because he's within my grasp. Defective relationships, here I come. Let's blame Thorn again.

I spoke to him on facebook the other night, as well. He denied his sloppy seconds and we were ok. This doesn't mean that I want to be friends, however.

A matter of extreme emergency, too. I have had a massive breakout of spots thanks to this Simple so-called kind to sensitive skin stuff. Hello allergic reaction. Ho hum.

Also I picked up my friend today because we were going to see the A2 drama students' play, and I forgot to put the handbrake on when I parked, so by the time we got to the car it had started to roll off. We got the *lolz* and I grabbed the back door handle while he got in the car and yanked the handbrake up. Naturally I scolded him for not pushing in the button because it makes that horrible grating sound before thanking him. But he didn't mind.
The play was hilarious.